I have never been out on a first date without the main goal of the evening not being sex. It is my priority for the night. It is why I seek to be interesting to that woman on that night. It is why I try to connect to her on a physical and emotional level. It is why I touch her hands and brush her hair. I want it to be, if nothing else, physical. Because at the end of the night I want to get laid, bang, fuck, however you want to phrase it. The truth of it is: So does she. If any guy say’s that sex is not their priority for the night they are telling a bold face lie. And the reason a woman will say it is not tops on her agenda for the night is simply she does not want the label of being called a slut.
One of my friends, who happen to be a woman, tells me, “I didn’t want to sleep with him on the first night, because he might think I sleep around, and I really like him, but fuck, I really wanted too.” I usually say to her, “what is the different between this week and next week?” She usually answers with something vague like, “perception.” The only difference in sleeping with someone today and seven days from now is just that, seven days, but for some reason women believe that giving it up a week later will remove the stigma of being a slut. Personally, I do not see anything wrong with men and women engaging in casual sex. It is natural to lust and want someone on a physical level, why does a label have to come with what is enjoyable to a person? I also don’t see anything wrong with sleeping with someone you are attracted to on many levels on the first date. The other levels of attraction will not magically disappear if you sleep with them on the first night, if anything they will intensify because you engaged in something passionate.
Coincidentally, this same friend will be down about the date if the guy didn’t try any moves to get in her pants or up her dress. The focus now becomes what did she do or say, or most importantly, he wasn’t attracted to me. A man not being attracted to a woman is crushing to her ego or how she see’s her value, especially if the man is an attractive man. An extremely attractive women see’s herself as heaven and her vagina the holy of holy grails, so if a man, that she decided to go out with, pays no mind to her honey pot it eats away at her, even if it’s short lived (very attractive women have a way of saying “oh well” very quickly). My friend would say, “I was disappointed he didn’t try anything, not even a kiss.” To which I would tell her, “Are you not the same person that didn’t want to seem like a slut.”
“Yeah, but a girl wants to feel wanted.”
Now, there are some women that will say that such a woman lacks depth, character, intelligence, is one dimensional and so on, but you take two women vying for a guy (or not even), one extremely attractive and the other average with all the character, intelligence and dimensions in the world; and a guy shows more attention to the more attractive woman, I don’t care what anyone says, the one of lesser attraction will start to feel her value being crushed and will begin to showcase her qualities on full display. Incidentally, it will usually be her intelligence, for some ridiculous reason women of average looks tend to believe very attractive women are stupid. The bottom line is, like my friend said: “Yeah, but a girl wants to feel wanted.”
Wanted! Men and women both want to feel wanted, desired. What makes us feel more wanted than someone wanting our bodies, someone lusting over us? Sex. Sex and sex alone. How do you feel after you have had really, really, great sex? I know I feel out of this stratosphere. Sure I am needed at my job, my boss tells me all the time, “we are lucky to have you,” but that satisfies me on another level, it does not satisfy me on my most basic biological level which I yearn for daily. What it all boils down to is basic desires and needs: So give me air, food, water, then fuck me.