We are so silly, us humans. We found what we have been longing. What we have been needing–wanting. We found the other. We are caught up in a whirlwind of infatuation, or mad, fearless love. We exist alone in the world. Two hearts meeting at the center of the universe.
Then we bring mind and logic into the picture. We start to want to label, to categorize, to define, to actualize the love that we have. We start to listen and value the opinions of others. What do they think about him? What do they think about her? What do think about us? Where is this going? I want him to be like this? I want her to be like that?
Inevitably one will start calling the other more, texting more. The other will start to be turned off by it. So you stop. The other, now, wondering what is going on. Why have they stop calling and texting me those heart “emoji?” Has someone else come into the picture? A seed has been planted. The other, now, starts to call more, and text more. Both are trying to define, and the more definition you give to the love, the more uncertain everything becomes.
Soon you find yourself in a relationship defined by the mind, defined by the opinions of others. Defined by society. You find yourself in an ocean with maps of assumptions, navigating with logic. Logic that has no business being in your love. You encounter a storm. A storm that in the beginning you both would have embraced fearlessly. Now there is too much definition. The storm grabs a hold of the defined. Break it apart–it is a bullshit definition. You drift, and drift, and drift, further apart. Holding onto driftwood, remnants of what you once had. You are shipwrecked. The other on an island as far away as you can see.
You are more alone now than ever. Alone and afraid. Both of you have fucked up love. Both have turned your own personal love for one another into a fucking reality TV show. You have labeled and boxed something that cannot be contained. You corralled the wild, and try to tame it. Where did it go wrong? You ask yourself over and over. Your so-call friends dress your ego. But in you, you are alone, still. You dig a depressive hole, and you bury yourself in it. If your ego is not a coward, you will resurrect. Resurrect with an even more stronger ego. Layered with even more bullshit. You have been tainted, you will say, “tainted by love.”
However, if you are aware, and in your depression you have awoken your consciousness-your self. You will see it all. Nature will once again show you how to love.
The Plant and the Earth
Of all the love affairs in the universe I find this one to be the most beautiful, the most telling when it come to relationships.
The earth will nourish the plant, and the plant will grow wings–leaves and branches. The plant will provide the earth with shade, keeping the nourishment always moist. When weeds come about–your so-call friends–to suffocate and destroy the love, the plant will grow fruits and drop them upon the earth. Some of the fruits will seep into the earth to provide more nourishment needed for the time. Some animals will come and feed, in doing so the animals–your true friends–will destroy the weeds, too. Your true friends are the gardeners of your love.
In time, through this symbiosis, this togetherness, growth will happen. It is the purpose of all relationship. To provide maximum space, and maximum growth, and maximum support. Nothing is defined or label. You just grow wild. The earth wants the plant to grow into a tree that reaches the heavens, with wings that span above mountain ranges. The plant will reach the driest parts of the earth, giving nourishment, giving fruit, building oasis. The plant will give the earth forest–more and more love.
One does not suffocate the other, one allows the other to be, just be, plainly as they are in the world. One allows the other the freedom to be what they will be. All they do is support one another. They do not try to define one another. They do not try to define what they have. They just are. Love just is.